|The Daily Show With Jon Stewart||Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c|
|Moment of Zen – Michelle Obama Has a Cheeseburger|
Nope. Racoons have way more calories than that (at least adult ones). Granted, the gentleman did specify a live raccoon, which would require more energy to digest. Raccoons (apparently) weigh in at about 3.5 – 9kg for an adult. 85g provides about 217kcal. Let’s say the raccoon to be ingested by Mrs. Obama is on the low end, say 5kg. 5000g / 85g is about 59. So, 59 * 217 is 12803kcal. And that is for a modestly sized raccoon!
Even if this raccoon is feisty in the extreme and puts up a hell of a fight, the most you are likely to expend during fisticuffs is 257kcal (165lb 30y/o male fighting the raccoon for 20 minutes). Let’s also say that your body expends 10% of the energy provided by the live raccoon in question to work extra hard at digesting the raw meat (as opposed to easier-to-eat-and-digest cooked meat). That still leaves about 11306kcal (12803 * .9 – 217) unaccounted for!
Shame on you Fox News. Actually on second thought, perhaps Fox was just putting the caloric content of Mrs. Obama’s meal into terms that could be understood by the show’s audience: raccoons, squirrels, muskrat, etc.
The Onion but real.